Why must you say it?

Had a discussion this morning with a person that is very important to me and whose opinion I value. It started us talking about profanity, in general. Why do people say fuck and shit and a whole slew of other cusswords? WHY must one resort to "those" words to express oneself? I am not a prude,(after all, I am from Europe, where EVERYTHING goes!) but I find it offensive, and I lose respect for the person that uses those words. It almost makes one think that their vocabulary is so limited that the ONLY way to express their emotions is to use those words. How sad! But more and more, people think it is perfectly ok to use them in every day life. I hear mothers using it when they talk to their children. The other day, I was having a conversation with a friend of mine, ans she said "...And I told him..You fucking idiot........you will........." And this to a 9 year old child! I cringed, but said only " You talk to your kids that way" to which she replied "fucking straight!" UGH! That child will grow up using those words as if it is perfectly natural to do. Plus, how hurt must he feel when his own mother says something like that to him? I feel bad for him. But I guess when you hear that kind of talk all around you, it seems perfectly natural. (I think that if my son, daughter, or husband EVER told me to "fuck off" I would be so hurt. But then, I know they wouldn't because they are the people that they are.)So amybe the reason people do use that kind of language is because nobody says "don't talk like that around me" for fear that they would make fun of you, and think you are old a prude and just plain out of touch. But any decent human being that's worth anything doesn't NEED to resort to those words. Surely, there are plenty of other words that would get your point across....Right?

My Third Child

The picture below is of my third child, Sam. YES, he is spoiled, YES he has the run of the house and everyone in it, and YES we are all crazy about the Red Headed Stepchild!!!!! He is so wonderful!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sammy 

Paranoia

Yes, I have it! The worst case of paranoia possible!!!!! It is that feeling you get when you see two people whispering to each other at work, and you just KNOW they are talking about you! Or you read a magazine article about some terrible sickness, and about half way through it, you think.... I HAVE THOSE SYMPTOMS!!!! O my God! Sad but true...And it doesn't get any easier or better with time. I am paranoid about my children, husband, and even my dog and cat! And worst of all, I think that nobody is reading my posts! How sad....I am paranoid about that too......

Laurie and Chase 

Did you know?

Did you know that when I was pregnant with you, a doctor told me you were not alive?
Did you know that when I found out you were ok, I almost kissed a complete stranger?
Did you know that I KNEW you were going to be a boy?
Did you know that I had your crib next to my bed during the first 6 months so I could hear you breathe?
Did you know that I slept next to you every night when you had your hernia surgery?
Did you know that I drove 100 miles an hour to get you to a hospital when you poked yourself in the eye with a knife?
Did you know that I didn't remember my name or where I lived, when the 911 lady asked me, when you fell on the playground?
Did you know that I don't remember how i got to the hospital when you broke your arm?
Did you know that I wouldn't let you stay in the hospital by yourself, but slept on the chair next to your bed?
Did you know that I wanted to kill those older boys that wanted to burn you with the cigarette?
Did you know that I volunteered at your school so I could see how your teachers treat you?
Did you know that I hated that teacher that made your life miserable?
Did you know that you made my day when we went boating on Lake Mead?
Did you know that I enjoyed playing "washing machine" in the pool with you?
Did you know that I blamed your sister when you ran into the steel pole at WalMart?
Did you know that I counted every minute till you came back, when you would go somewhere on your bike?
Did you know that when it snows, I think of you and me going outside in the middle of the night, to play in the snow?
Did you know that staying up all night to see a meteor shower with you was wonderful?
Did you know that it was hard for me to see you play football?
Did you know it was hard for me to let you go somewhere in your car without me when you first got your license?
Did you know that I liked playing Tomb Raider because of you?
Did you know you could have anything you wanted by just asking me, even my car?
Did you know that your hugs can instantly make everything ok?
Did you know it was hard for me to let you go to school in Vermont?
Did you know that I cried most of the way home from Vermont when we left you there?
Did you know that it is even harder to know you are going to be in the military?
Did you know how happy I am when I see your smiling face or hear your voice on the phone?
Did you know that even though I get up at 4 am, I wait to see your name on the IM, no matter how late, so that I can at least know that you are ok?
Did you know that I think and worry about you every day?
Did you know that you are a really GOOD and REMARKABLE person?
Did you know that I am very, very proud of the man you have become?
Did you know that you have my heart forever?
Did you know I love you?

The BEST thing

I am no spring chicken, as they say......I have seen a lot of things, been to a lot of places, but have never experienced anything like the love I feel for my children. It is a love that is hard to explain, especially to my childless friends. To say that it is all consuming, would be an understatement. I would give my life, without a moment's hesitation, for either of them. (And God help ANYONE that hurts them.) They are both very special people and I am immensly proud of them.
Both of my children are out of the house now. My daughter lives in the same town, but on her own, and my son is away at college. I miss those days when they were little, and sometimes wish it could be like that again. The moment I saw my daughter's face, in the delivery room, I fell in love with her. She was, and still is, really special. As the years went by we grew up together. I can almost see her, 2-3 yers old, running around in the back yard, under the sprinkler. Her laugh echoing in my head. And if I close my eyes, for a moment I am almost there.....I can smell the fresh cut grass, see the sunshine, and bask in the moment of days gone by way to fast! We used to sleep in the same bed while her Dad was overseas, and share a great love for each other. I remember how I used to lay next to her and watch her sleep, and I remember thinking how happy I was, how my life couldn't possibly be any better. I think we have that "something" that many mothers and daughters wish they could have...respect and love for each other. I will never forget when we were walking in the mall one day. Laurie was 16. We saw a girl walking way ahead of her mother, who was trying to keep up with her daughter. Poor woman was almost running, but her daughter was acting like she didn't know her. Laurie reached for my hand and said to me "Look at that Mom! Isn't that sad? Doesn't she know? Everyone has a Mom. She is just hurting her mother!" I think that was the moment that I loved her more than ever. She does things like that still, sometimes it will be a note, or a card that makes me cry. What can I say, she is something else. She is a grown up now, but I wish for those summers we were each other's best friends....